Monthly Archives: June 2009

Let’s Face It…

Talk about COURAGE…

Touring around Philadelphia’s Independance Hall today, I was completely awe inspired at the amount of courage it must have taken for a small group of passionate individuals to create a  political revolution and resultant form of government known to person-kind. Imagine the amount of sacrifice and risk that these Founding Fathers, and YES, mothers, made in pursuit of religious and political freedom. In the center of the storm, they withstood the tumultuous pressures until freedom was acheived. The net result, is the single best system of governance…DEMOCRACY.

The risk/reward factor of their courage had a positive payback beyond measure. Imagine if we excersized even a modicum of that courage in our daily lives. How? Here’s what I was thinking today in Philadelphia…

We live task saturated lives and are all to often confronted with important issues that we simply can not attend to (can anyone relate?). I mean, we don’t intentionally suppress or repress these issues, but none the less, but as a coping mechanism we do it.  I strongly believe that the net result of this avoidance behavior is additional stress and tension.

The solution is this: take a lesson from our nation’s founders and have the courage to acknowledge your issues and begin to resolve them. At a minimum, take inventory of the issues in writing, and when you’re able to, FACE them.

Remember…we can’t solve all of the issues we face – but we can’t solve ANY of them unless we FACE them.




Had an interesting experience today that was both meaningful and profound for me. I needed to confront someone on a matter- someone who is very dear to me- who I dearly love and who unintentionally had made a poor decision leading to tension between us, hard feelings on my part and a bit of ‘guilt’ on hers. These are pretty high on the list of negative emotions which are so common and so dang damaging to the human condition so it wouldn’t server either of us to carry them around. Hence today’s experience.
I decided to Illuminate the situation and FACE it head on. In doing so, I needed to sort of FOLLOW IT, which is to say that I considered where my feelings were coming from, what they were effecting (feeling lousy, hurt, angry) and what her feelings might be (I didnt really know for certain). Then with all of this, I began a conversation with her to FIX IT- which we did.
In order for this to happen, we needed to allow ourselves some space, some vulnerability and be open to outcome.
So, at lunch, I took the opportunity to ‘address the elephant in the middle of the room’ and, with love and respect, spoke my truth.
Guess what happened?
I’ll tell you on the next blog- NOT. Here’s what happened. We each had an opportunity to express our feelings- and it was awesome. As always, the reward far exceeded the risk. I can assure you that this simple event is a huge addition to our solid relationship. With her sincere apology I had no need whatsoever to elephant stomp her to transfer pain or any of that crap that is all too common.
My grandmother once said, and I quoted this in my Psyched On Service book, that “a delicate tea cup that is broken and then mended is now stronger than had it not been broken.”
Our relationship was not broken, but I can assure you that its stronger than ever.

great example

im at a wonderful and lovely boutique hotel on the river in downtown chicago after doing work at the merchandise mart nearby. it really is lovely with european flare and style – outside tables with umbrellas, really cute. however, check in was abominable. rude, cold, inappropriate, inattentive – like they poured ‘white out’ and totally obscured all of the other wonderful efforts to impress and embrace the guest. what a shame. there are investors, designers, housekeepers and more who work and work to create a positive impression only to have these two employees, in a matter of minutes, undermine that work.
so….i was here in the club – on the internet (for a change!) and saw a pod of suited manager types walking about with notes and collaboration – clearly hotel management. feeling a compulsion to represent those aforementioned contributors to this hotel, i introduced myself and gave them a ‘free and loving consultation’. how did they react?……. open, allowing vulnerability, engaged and appreciative. THIS IS WHY THEY WILL THRIVE WHEN OTHERS ARE STRUGGLING TO SURVIVE. they were really digging on my observations and suggestions. they were willing to illuminate. in fact, i shared with them the three step process of face it, follow it, fix it and they took notes. later, (just now) they came back and showed me how they applied the 3 steps to an issue that they were having with their reservations department. how cool was that?
so…. im beaming… for many reasons.
now im off to wrigley field to see chicago cubs vs chicago white sox on a last minute opportunity to go. karma baby!

face it

we cant solve all that we face… .but we can never solve anything unless and until we face it. what are you ‘avoiding’ dealing with?
we often avoid things that we dont have the answer at hand. it’s frustrating not having the answer and we sure dont want to hold onto these issues and take up our ‘mental’ space. i’ve observed that people, when confronted with this, tend to ignore, deny, suppress or just ‘let it slide’.
an idea to try on- and it’s worked for me and when i consult- is to capture that issue on paper and keep it posted. come to it from time to time. dont let it get away. it’s not going away anyway. in the dark, like mushrooms, it will grow and multiply in power.
keep it posted and trust that, if you re-visit it, you will create, attract or invent solutions. face it and have faith in yourself and your support system to come up with the necessary resources to make it right.